I was best man of the wedding of three best of friends. If you are chosen as a best man, you have to take it seriously. I can write a book already on the duties and responsibilities of being a best man. I will write a little bit about it but my intention in writing this is for men who are contemplating about pursuing a relationship and/or getting married.
Being the Best Man
As a best man, you should be the one ushering your friends to pray for the couple. At the venue, ask friends around to do prayer walk at the wedding ceremony area, reception area, and for a great weather. Pray for the pastor’s anointing to preach about marriage and the Gospel.
When ceremony starts, pray for the Gospel to be heard by the guests. When the couple honors their parents, pray that they too will see God’s faithfulness through the lives of the couple.
More than the duties of holding the microphone, carrying/removing chairs, holding the wedding rings, among other things, best man’s role is to pray for God’s presence to be felt during the wedding day.
Being the Groom
I always say that when you pursue a woman for a relationship, being the groom should be the end in your mind. It is a waste of time if you are just looking for a companion – that is what your friends are for.
Vision for marriage makes it exciting to look forward to a future of togetherness with only one person, and makes you feel prepared and ready when it comes.
Thinking about being a groom when pursuing a relationship makes you assess about your readiness to be with just one person for the rest of your life. It is sad to note when men are so focused in looking for a perfect woman and they fail to prepare themselves to be the perfect man.
Preparing yourself includes failing to some attempts and maybe getting dumped. Act on it and just get your acts together if you fail. It is not the end of the world. It is a new beginning.
Ask out the girl that you like for coffee. Stop scanning facebook or instagram profiles and assessing if she will like you or not. You cannot replace real conversations with digital assessments.
If you are in a relationship already, it is about time to step up and surround yourself with well-meaning friends. These friends are not those who will put unnecessary pressure to make you propose to your girlfriend. Look for friends who will encourage you instead to make God first in your heart.
Our heart is a house of idol and marriage can be an idol. Break it and offer it to God.
These things can be tricky though because you will not always hear an audible voice from God saying that it is about time.
It will take a lot of faith and courage for you to propose. When you feel it, do it!
I am so proud to witness the marriage of these three friends because they put all courage to propose and be the groom. In a series of conversations, I could feel it in my heart that they pursued God first. It did not matter where and if they will be rejected because they are secure.
It was a leap of faith! They know that the money in their bank account will not always be enough to afford a wedding. But they have a bigger God who was and is always faithful at the end of the wedding day.
It is such a privilege to be their best man. I was at the front seat of their wedding day. I am at the front seat seeing God’s glorious face in their marriage.
WRITTEN BY: JUNVER ARCAYNA
PHOTO: Digital Eyesights Photography and Services